so i'm going to see my surgeon tomorrow morning and i need some moral support. there's so much background info related to this and i'm not sure how much i need to list here because i'm not sure who's going to be reading this and what (if anything) y'all know about me and my journey. i guess i'll start out by listing everything i can think of and just directing y'all to my blogs for further information.
i began my journey on 11-27-06 with lap rny. everything was going groovy until 12-23-06 when i had a perf'd ulcer. i was rushed to emergency surgery (if you can call waiting two hours for an ambulance to drive me another hour and a half to the hospital and then waiting another two hours for surgery "rushing"...) i was then kept in the hospital for two weeks "NPO" so the perforation could heal. (NPO = nothing by mouth)
since then i've had several strictures that i've had to have dilated and then i had my gall bladder removed and an internal hernia repaired on may 30, 2007. then in december (just two weeks after my one year check-up with my surgeon) i began to gain weight. i gained roughly a pound a day for two weeks without changing ANYTHING about my diet or exercise routine.
when i called my surgeon about this (thinking i might have an obstruction or something) he informed me that he believed it to be "dietary" and for me to come in and see the nutritionist. this upset me very much because when i was in his (the surgeon's AND nutritionist's) office just two weeks prior i was informed that my pouch was MUCH smaller than the typical rny'ers pouch because of the perf'd ulcer and the repair that had to be done and then because of the scar tissue that developed on top of it all. so basically he told me that i can't eat very much at a time and then two weeks later i'm all of a sudden eating like a cow again??? wtf!
so i DIDN'T go see the nutritionist because i thought that was just plain silly. i called my pcp instead because obviously my surgeon wasn't concerned. well, my pcp informed me (over the phone and without seeing me AT ALL!!!) that i was "full of $hit" and to take dulcolax. (i'm serious you guys. those were her EXACT WORDS!!!) and whenever i would call her back about this she would repeat herself. AGAIN, without even seeing me!!! so i took dulcolax. and i took dulcolax. AND I TOOK DULCOLAX!!!! and eventually one didn't work anymore. and then two didn't work anymore. and then three and then four, etc, etc, etc. (hmm... maybe because there wasn't anything left inside of me??????)
and NOW... i can't poo WITHOUT laxatives! **sigh** so i'm trying to get all this worked out so that i CAN poo without laxatives but it's very difficult. it's hard to admit that you need help. and it's even harder to admit that you need help with something this embarrassing. (even though it ISN'T MY FAULT!!!!) and btw, the mysterious weight gain was NOT dietary OR because i was "full of $hit". it was because i had endometriosis and a LOT of abdominal adhesions and it took getting my ob-gyn involved to actually get to the bottom of it all! (which resulted in YET ANOTHER abdominal surgery!!!)
i called my gastro doc last week to see if he could get me in and scoped to check for ulcers because i'm getting really scared about all this. i've been having "reflux/ulcer-like" pain for a couple of weeks now and i seriously don't want another perf'd ulcer so i was trying to seek help for this. well, i got the call back from my gastro doc on thursday morning and was informed that i've been "dismissed as a patient". idk exactly what happened except that i apparently had a balance with their office that i was unaware of and since they never heard from me (i moved and they don't have my new address) they sent it off to collections and dismissed me as a patient.
this freaked me out terribly because i was under the impression that this gastro doc was the ONLY one allowed to scope me after my rny. (per my rny surgeon's instructions anyway.) so i called my surgeon and explained everything to the nurse's voicemail and asked for help. well, they called me back and said that he wants to see me tomorrow and they went ahead and scheduled my appointment.
i called them back on friday and asked if i could have some blood work run in the meantime and hopefully he could have it back by the time i go in for my appointment. the nurse was going to fax the orders over but when she spoke to my surgeon about it he decided to wait until seeing me tomorrow to order anything and also said for me to be on liquids in the meantime. FULL liquids, not just clear liquids.
i've been trying to do liquids ever since but it's just so darn hard!!! i want to eat things and before i realize it i'll have eaten a handful of cashews or something and then sort of "wake up" and realize what i'm doing. so... i haven't done "all liquids" at all yet. heck even this morning i've already had about 6 saltines!! and add to that the fact that my girlfriend doesn't understand what's going on with me right now and thinks i'm just saying that they told me to do liquids because i "feel fat and don't want to eat". ok look, whatever. i can't call them on a sunday and have them tell her that i'm telling the truth. and because of this she's been "feeding me" ever since thursday because she believes this will somehow "help" me.
i ended up going to med-plus on saturday because of the abdominal pains i was having. i didn't tell the dr. there about the laxatives or anything but i DID tell him about the surgery i had on valentine's day (when the endometriosis and adhesions were burned off) and he thought my abdominal pain could be caused by adhesions growing back but wanted to run some labs first to be sure. he did a cbc which came back "fine" and then he also ran a urinalysis. he came back into the room and told me that i had a LOT of blood in my urine (and asked me repeatedly if i was on my period and i am NOT and it isn't time for it either) as well as some bacteria in my urine. he thinks it's a uti or a kidney stone and gave me some antibiotics and pain pills to get me by until he can get the culture back on the urine.
i'm so nervous about going to see my surgeon tomorrow. idk what to tell him anymore. i know that i'm going to be screamed at tomorrow no matter what i say, that much is for sure. and knowing this makes me somewhat skeptical about how "honest" i need to be with him. i KNOW that i need to tell him EVERYTHING in order to receive the help that i need. but i don't want to get b!tched out. i'm really fragile right now (yeah i know, right? ME??? FRAGILE??? but alas, 'tis true...) and idk if i can deal with that or not. this is so intimidating!!! god, somebody go with me tomorrow. please? PLEASE????? i really don't think i can do this on my own. it's just too much...
i began my journey on 11-27-06 with lap rny. everything was going groovy until 12-23-06 when i had a perf'd ulcer. i was rushed to emergency surgery (if you can call waiting two hours for an ambulance to drive me another hour and a half to the hospital and then waiting another two hours for surgery "rushing"...) i was then kept in the hospital for two weeks "NPO" so the perforation could heal. (NPO = nothing by mouth)
since then i've had several strictures that i've had to have dilated and then i had my gall bladder removed and an internal hernia repaired on may 30, 2007. then in december (just two weeks after my one year check-up with my surgeon) i began to gain weight. i gained roughly a pound a day for two weeks without changing ANYTHING about my diet or exercise routine.
when i called my surgeon about this (thinking i might have an obstruction or something) he informed me that he believed it to be "dietary" and for me to come in and see the nutritionist. this upset me very much because when i was in his (the surgeon's AND nutritionist's) office just two weeks prior i was informed that my pouch was MUCH smaller than the typical rny'ers pouch because of the perf'd ulcer and the repair that had to be done and then because of the scar tissue that developed on top of it all. so basically he told me that i can't eat very much at a time and then two weeks later i'm all of a sudden eating like a cow again??? wtf!
so i DIDN'T go see the nutritionist because i thought that was just plain silly. i called my pcp instead because obviously my surgeon wasn't concerned. well, my pcp informed me (over the phone and without seeing me AT ALL!!!) that i was "full of $hit" and to take dulcolax. (i'm serious you guys. those were her EXACT WORDS!!!) and whenever i would call her back about this she would repeat herself. AGAIN, without even seeing me!!! so i took dulcolax. and i took dulcolax. AND I TOOK DULCOLAX!!!! and eventually one didn't work anymore. and then two didn't work anymore. and then three and then four, etc, etc, etc. (hmm... maybe because there wasn't anything left inside of me??????)
and NOW... i can't poo WITHOUT laxatives! **sigh** so i'm trying to get all this worked out so that i CAN poo without laxatives but it's very difficult. it's hard to admit that you need help. and it's even harder to admit that you need help with something this embarrassing. (even though it ISN'T MY FAULT!!!!) and btw, the mysterious weight gain was NOT dietary OR because i was "full of $hit". it was because i had endometriosis and a LOT of abdominal adhesions and it took getting my ob-gyn involved to actually get to the bottom of it all! (which resulted in YET ANOTHER abdominal surgery!!!)
i called my gastro doc last week to see if he could get me in and scoped to check for ulcers because i'm getting really scared about all this. i've been having "reflux/ulcer-like" pain for a couple of weeks now and i seriously don't want another perf'd ulcer so i was trying to seek help for this. well, i got the call back from my gastro doc on thursday morning and was informed that i've been "dismissed as a patient". idk exactly what happened except that i apparently had a balance with their office that i was unaware of and since they never heard from me (i moved and they don't have my new address) they sent it off to collections and dismissed me as a patient.
this freaked me out terribly because i was under the impression that this gastro doc was the ONLY one allowed to scope me after my rny. (per my rny surgeon's instructions anyway.) so i called my surgeon and explained everything to the nurse's voicemail and asked for help. well, they called me back and said that he wants to see me tomorrow and they went ahead and scheduled my appointment.
i called them back on friday and asked if i could have some blood work run in the meantime and hopefully he could have it back by the time i go in for my appointment. the nurse was going to fax the orders over but when she spoke to my surgeon about it he decided to wait until seeing me tomorrow to order anything and also said for me to be on liquids in the meantime. FULL liquids, not just clear liquids.
i've been trying to do liquids ever since but it's just so darn hard!!! i want to eat things and before i realize it i'll have eaten a handful of cashews or something and then sort of "wake up" and realize what i'm doing. so... i haven't done "all liquids" at all yet. heck even this morning i've already had about 6 saltines!! and add to that the fact that my girlfriend doesn't understand what's going on with me right now and thinks i'm just saying that they told me to do liquids because i "feel fat and don't want to eat". ok look, whatever. i can't call them on a sunday and have them tell her that i'm telling the truth. and because of this she's been "feeding me" ever since thursday because she believes this will somehow "help" me.
i ended up going to med-plus on saturday because of the abdominal pains i was having. i didn't tell the dr. there about the laxatives or anything but i DID tell him about the surgery i had on valentine's day (when the endometriosis and adhesions were burned off) and he thought my abdominal pain could be caused by adhesions growing back but wanted to run some labs first to be sure. he did a cbc which came back "fine" and then he also ran a urinalysis. he came back into the room and told me that i had a LOT of blood in my urine (and asked me repeatedly if i was on my period and i am NOT and it isn't time for it either) as well as some bacteria in my urine. he thinks it's a uti or a kidney stone and gave me some antibiotics and pain pills to get me by until he can get the culture back on the urine.
i'm so nervous about going to see my surgeon tomorrow. idk what to tell him anymore. i know that i'm going to be screamed at tomorrow no matter what i say, that much is for sure. and knowing this makes me somewhat skeptical about how "honest" i need to be with him. i KNOW that i need to tell him EVERYTHING in order to receive the help that i need. but i don't want to get b!tched out. i'm really fragile right now (yeah i know, right? ME??? FRAGILE??? but alas, 'tis true...) and idk if i can deal with that or not. this is so intimidating!!! god, somebody go with me tomorrow. please? PLEASE????? i really don't think i can do this on my own. it's just too much...
