yeah, i can google with the best of them but you guys are sometimes tougher on me than my own momma (and that's saying a LOT!!!) and that's really what i need right now... some TOUGH LOVE. i know that i need to seek professional help. i know that you guys cannot REALLY help me here. what i'm asking for is some good solid scare tactics with cold hard facts about laxatives.
i KNOW that laxatives are dangerous. i KNOW that you shouldn't take them more often or more at a time than necessary. i KNOW that they don't help you lose weight and can actually cause bloating from gas and water retention. (and truth be told, i don't NEED to lose anymore weight! i mean, have you SEEN my avatar???)
but that doesn't stop me from taking 4-6 dulcolax LAXATIVES (NOT the stool softeners!!!) after nearly everything i put in my mouth. (i'm serious here folks. i had a slice of swiss cheese for breakfast and followed it up with 4 dulcolax's and a caffeine free diet pepsi.)
now, keep in mind that these things make me feel like absolute dog$hit for a very very long time after taking them. (imagine the worst dumping episode you've ever gone through times ten AT LEAST and there you have it minus the sleeping the day away part.)
like, yesterday i took 6 dulcolax's around 2:00pm. by 8:00pm (when i was planning on playing littlest pet shop monopoly with my 8 year old daughter) i started cramping and getting nauseated and lightheaded and had to sit in the bathroom for a long time. while i was sitting there i promised myself that i would never ever use another laxative again as long as i lived because i felt so bad. and then i took 6 more dulcolax's just before bedtime 2 1/2 hours later.
it's a compulsion and i can't seem to make myself stop! i knew i was in trouble when i bought a box of 100 laxatives a week and a half ago instead of the usual 25 count box but i did it anyway. i've already blown through that 100 count box AND an 18 count box of chocolate ex-lax. in 10 days. i also have a 25 count pack of dulcolax that's calling to me right now. idk why... i have no frickin' clue why i do this!!! i HATE this!!! (he!! i don't even like to poo!!!)
this all started in december when my pcp told me i was "full of shit" and to take a dulcolax. i had gained a pound a day for more than two weeks without changing anything about my diet or exercise regime and that was her response to my phone call voicing concern over this matter. so i took dulcolax. lots and lots of dulcolax. for a very long time. then my ob-gyn FINALLY did an exploratory laparoscopy on valentine's day and burned off a bunch of endometriosis and abdominal adhesions which is where the pain and bloating/weight gain came from.
and now? i can't poo without laxatives.
and now? i can’t stand to go more than a day without going poo because it hurts and my clothes don’t fit.
and now? it takes 5-6 at a time to produce anything.
and now??? i take anywhere from 6-18 A DAY!!!!!
again, i know that i need to seek professional help. i know that you guys cannot REALLY help me here. what i'm asking for is some good solid scare tactics with cold hard facts about laxatives. please don't patronize me or send me "great big cyber (((((HUGS)))))" and tell me that you hope i feel better soon. if that's your response, please save it for someone that it'll actually help. (i'm really honestly NOT trying to be snotty here so please please PLEASE don't take it that way.) i just feel like crying because i don't know what to do. well, i know WHAT to do (don't take laxatives!!!) but i don't know how to get to that point because i seem to do it without even thinking about it! like, you get up in the morning and go pee. well, i eat something and then take laxatives.
i KNOW that laxatives are dangerous. i KNOW that you shouldn't take them more often or more at a time than necessary. i KNOW that they don't help you lose weight and can actually cause bloating from gas and water retention. (and truth be told, i don't NEED to lose anymore weight! i mean, have you SEEN my avatar???)
but that doesn't stop me from taking 4-6 dulcolax LAXATIVES (NOT the stool softeners!!!) after nearly everything i put in my mouth. (i'm serious here folks. i had a slice of swiss cheese for breakfast and followed it up with 4 dulcolax's and a caffeine free diet pepsi.)
now, keep in mind that these things make me feel like absolute dog$hit for a very very long time after taking them. (imagine the worst dumping episode you've ever gone through times ten AT LEAST and there you have it minus the sleeping the day away part.)
like, yesterday i took 6 dulcolax's around 2:00pm. by 8:00pm (when i was planning on playing littlest pet shop monopoly with my 8 year old daughter) i started cramping and getting nauseated and lightheaded and had to sit in the bathroom for a long time. while i was sitting there i promised myself that i would never ever use another laxative again as long as i lived because i felt so bad. and then i took 6 more dulcolax's just before bedtime 2 1/2 hours later.
it's a compulsion and i can't seem to make myself stop! i knew i was in trouble when i bought a box of 100 laxatives a week and a half ago instead of the usual 25 count box but i did it anyway. i've already blown through that 100 count box AND an 18 count box of chocolate ex-lax. in 10 days. i also have a 25 count pack of dulcolax that's calling to me right now. idk why... i have no frickin' clue why i do this!!! i HATE this!!! (he!! i don't even like to poo!!!)
this all started in december when my pcp told me i was "full of shit" and to take a dulcolax. i had gained a pound a day for more than two weeks without changing anything about my diet or exercise regime and that was her response to my phone call voicing concern over this matter. so i took dulcolax. lots and lots of dulcolax. for a very long time. then my ob-gyn FINALLY did an exploratory laparoscopy on valentine's day and burned off a bunch of endometriosis and abdominal adhesions which is where the pain and bloating/weight gain came from.
and now? i can't poo without laxatives.
and now? i can’t stand to go more than a day without going poo because it hurts and my clothes don’t fit.
and now? it takes 5-6 at a time to produce anything.
and now??? i take anywhere from 6-18 A DAY!!!!!
again, i know that i need to seek professional help. i know that you guys cannot REALLY help me here. what i'm asking for is some good solid scare tactics with cold hard facts about laxatives. please don't patronize me or send me "great big cyber (((((HUGS)))))" and tell me that you hope i feel better soon. if that's your response, please save it for someone that it'll actually help. (i'm really honestly NOT trying to be snotty here so please please PLEASE don't take it that way.) i just feel like crying because i don't know what to do. well, i know WHAT to do (don't take laxatives!!!) but i don't know how to get to that point because i seem to do it without even thinking about it! like, you get up in the morning and go pee. well, i eat something and then take laxatives.
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